Should You Get a Tattoo Right Now? What Your Emotional State Has to Do With It

I think there’s a piece of tattoo advice that no one is talking about, and it might be one of the most important ones. You can find endless articles, listicles, and Youtube videos, about finding the right artist, thinking about placement, style longevity, pain management, how not to let your dog lick your healing tattoo… we cover the ins and outs of the interpersonal dynamics, the design, the healing process, but we never really talk about the one thing that has massive downstream effects on all of them: the state you’re in when you decide your tattoo.

The One Thing No One Talks About When Getting a Tattoo

The state of your nervous system, whether rooted and grounded or destabilized and reaching, can do a lot to determine how a tattoo feels worn on your body. Because tattoos are symbolically loaded and viscerally lived visuals, there is massive potential in ensuring that your state is one that you also want to encode onto your body. Even if one could never guarantee that they won’t outgrow a tattoo, they can guarantee that they decided on that tattoo in a state that they couldn’t doubt.

I touched on the concept of Bounded Rationality in my previous piece—My Tattoo Mistakes (And What they taught me)—the concept that people are doing the best they can with the limited amount of information they have at any given moment. Had I known that 30 year old me would change, would regret my breakup tattoo, then I probably wouldn’t have gotten it. But I knew what I knew in that moment, and the tattoo felt like a way to reclaim my autonomy and to wish for a brighter future. Little did I understand at the time, I was deciding from a state that was destabilized, and so my tattoo carried that energy forward, too.

The Emotional Origin of a Tattoo

That tattoo in particular led me to develop the concept of the Emotional Origin of a tattoo- the state from which it emerges. For years, I didn't have language for this, but I felt it, every day. I called it my “bitter tattoo” because while it was trying to do something noble, wear this cape of empowerment, it ended up reminding me of how bitter I actually was when I got it. The state that this tattoo emerged from was one that was now solidified on my body, forever. And a few years later, i would go on to have it covered.

The Impossible Puzzle: Choosing a Tattoo That Lasts Forever

As I consider what advice my younger self—who didn’t and couldn’t have known what I know now—needed, it brings me back to the enigma that is Bounded Rationality and the choice to mark something permanently with a tattoo. What a wonderful opportunity we have to make bold creative statements on our bodies. It truly is the ultimate form of creative autonomy. But you only know what you know, right now. You don't know who you're becoming, and while you can have a sense of it, you can never truly know, definitively.

Every tattoo, every collector, is an expression of that person's unique experience at that point in time. So, naturally, each tattoo is totally unique. Sure, it might be the same crawling panther flash picked off the wall, or same generic Pinterest infinity sign, but its purpose and its story will always be uniquely individual, belonging exactly to the person who collected it. But the one constant that we all share is twofold: permanence as well as the changing self.

The psychological and temporal aspect of tattoos is fascinating to me. Tattoos exist on two impossibly contrasted timelines: right now and forever. So the choice to get a tattoo is asking you to mark a sense of self, in the now, that you will carry with you, for the rest of your life. And the kicker? You will change. It's guaranteed, in fact! The direction and degree to which you do is the only variable. So how do you navigate these timelines and choose a tattoo that you love now and also for the rest of your life? You throw your hands in the air at this impossible puzzle, walk into your nearest tattoo shop, and trust the tattoo gods!

Just kidding.

Introducing the Authorship Check

I kept asking myself this question as I attempted to really crystallize a framework around tattoo support, which led me to develop a concept called The Authorship Check. You don’t know who you will be in 20 years from now, even if you do have some guesses, but even with this quandry, there has to be a better way to honor your current self that really wants that tattoo, and your future self who should, ideally, still love that tattoo, too. The Authorship Check is my proposed solution to this problem: a simple three condition set of questions.

Am I Choosing This From a Stable or Destabilized State?

“Am I choosing this from a stable or destabilized state?”

“Does this resonate with me, or just appeal to me?”

And, “Am I willing to live with this, even when I change?”

Although one can never truly sit down with one’s future self, they can at least ensure that the decision has been considered within the context of permanence, change, and Bounded Rationality. And my belief is that a tattoo decision made with this integrity of consideration is one that you can look back upon fondly, knowing that you did your best with the information you had.

Why Your Emotional State Is the Foundation of It All

State, I would argue, is the foundation of these three conditions. Any tattoo, having passed the resonant versus appeal question and the willingness beyond change, is still anchored in the question of state. if your state is unstable, the answer to the next two questions may also be on shaky ground. Alternatively, if your state is confident and rooted, the following two conditions can be answered confidently, setting you up for a tattoo that becomes its most powerful addition to your identity.

The timeline of tattoos—right now and forever—is an interesting temporal riddle for us humans to ponder, with our quite limited understanding of the nature of time. And while I advocate for living in the only true window that we have at any given moment— right now— I also believe that forever holds enormous weight. This elephant in the tattoo room, forever, is best carried by a state that is secure, stabilized, and intentional. My breakup tattoo taught me this in real time.

The study of embodied cognition tells us that physical sensations anchor our memories more strongly than recall alone. This suggests that the physical element of tattooing is likely to amplify the state that it originated from. Tattoos can feel like time capsules, taking you back to the time, the place, the people, and the person that you used to be. This is why the state that you decide to get them in matters so much. The potential here is vast, and I want to explicitly err on the side of best-case scenarios: your tattoo can be an engineered device for your ideal sense of self.

Tattoos as Identity Technology: The Power of Intentional Choice

I truly believe that tattoos exist as a form of identity technology. They are a potent form of modernized ritual: a threshold you choose to cross into a new sense of self. Sometimes it is as serious as that sounds, marking a new chapter or healing, and sometimes it’s as beautifully irreverent as getting a funny tattoo that means nothing. The point is that it’s a choice you’re making to alter your forever. The power here in that choice is when it comes from a place of intention—a state that feels grounded and secure—and the tattoo will amplify that and become a powerful marker of your sense of autonomy.

What It Looks Like to Honor Your Right Now and Your Forever

Tattoos hold a compelling potential: looking at your body, for years, and feeling stronger, more beautiful, more affirmed, reminded of the perfect message at the perfect time. Seeing a version of your self that you designed on purpose, and soaking in the confidence that it gives you. Imagine looking at your body that you curated and thinking: I’m so happy I got this, look at how incredible I look and feel.

When you choose a tattoo consciously, in a state that doesn’t feel rushed, forced, urgent, or reaching, that tattoo holds power, regardless of what it is. It becomes the decision you made for yourself, for who you are and who you're becoming. Even when you change, a tattoo made from a grounded state sits differently. Honor your right now, but optimize for your forever, and make sure your state is one that is worth amplifying.

Want to explore over 1000 tattoo symbols, their meanings, and their stories? Try the Tattoo Concept Builder to build your next tattoo idea.

Read more about the Body as Story framework here: Body as Story: The Collector's Framework for Intentional Tattoo Design